Free Texts Or Free Internet O2?

how can i get free texts or free internet on my phone ( pay as you go, samsung pixon m8800).. im looking for a text maybe ( i mean, when you send a message then you have free texts for ever) ( i have this thing with free calls and i wish to have this with free texts or free internet.. im looking for an answer that is not going to be like : when you top up £15 blah blah, i read about this and i didnt learn anything from it.. thank you